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I knew this was coming, the time when I have to let go of someone who matters to me. Everything is not permanent, and all things are in constant motion.All things fade, all things change, even feelings, even the love I thought was mine.
At first I thought everything is fine. It felt as if I'm the happiest woman. I almost worship him. I treasured every moment, every word he said to me. Sweet talk, sweet moments. He was a gentleman, very kind, silent but cool. He was very easy to love, and very hard to forget.
I thought we were contented with each other. I thought this love would never end. I thought. But then, as time passes, I saw the gradual change of his love.
I can't complain. I don't have the right to. He was mine, only in my dreams. i can love him. I can care for him. But I can't own him. i thought he was in my hands. But when I looked closer, i realized he was very far, far from where I could reach.
He came to me one day, wearing my favorite smile. Bringing the very news that ignited all my sorrows. he said he was in love. With whom? Not with me, but with someone whom i didn't know. And he thanked me for being a good friend.
I didn't say anything. I was afraid that my voice would betray me. I did smile though, but not genuine. He didn't notice my fake smile because of so much happiness that his heart contained. And that, made it worse.
I said to myself I'm fine. i can take it. That was nothing. It was very easy to say that you have moved on. As time passes, I learned to smile. I can even look at them straightly when they're together. It took time, yes, but I made it. I thought. Yes, I only thought I had forgotten him. Why can't I forget him? If I had moved on, why does my heart still ache? I can't hide it forever. My heart is still broken. The pain was still there and was never alleviated. And now, I confess, I didn't forgot my feelings for him. I just learned, though not yet completely, how live without him.
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